Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
