Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
