Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
