Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
