We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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