she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
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