Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
