yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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