NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
third nipple confirmed
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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