how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Randomize
