Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
