Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
This is the high leading the old right now
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
