i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I will pee on everything he values.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Randomize
