According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
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Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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