Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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