so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
