In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
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