That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
