Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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