wake up i wanna do it froggy style
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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