So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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