meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
i black out too much to be "responsible"