the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
