i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
