Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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