I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
