im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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