Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
