David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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