Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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