Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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