Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize