No awkward lesbian experiences without me
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
