This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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