i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize