i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
