So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
