nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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