"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
