no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
The best revenge is premature balding
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
