Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I wanna passion pit in your ass
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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