So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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