You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
