You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
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Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
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It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"