Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
