Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize