i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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