i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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