You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
