So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
And the cops told us we were all naked.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
