If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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